By Marina Chen (2021)
Introduction
Fifty Shades of Grey, E.L. James’ red-hot, steel-cool erotica phenomenon, took the world by storm after its self-publication and subsequent Vintage Books publication in 2011 and 2012. However, dually reactive as its millions of copies sold and hordes of BDSM fledgling readers was a serious backlash from the real BDSM community (Cian). At its core, they argued, Fifty Shades is an abuse story that misrepresents the careful respect and experience that is required for a healthy Dom/sub relationship. The two protagonists, Ana Steel and Christian Grey, exemplify psychological red flags to some for whom the fantasy of Fifty Shades is reality. They also warned that depictions of bondage acts themselves were also inaccurate and could lead readers to harm if James’ novels were used as an instruction manual. First, a summary of the series’ initial success and influence on bringing BDSM into mainstream popular culture will be provided, and next, a brief history will highlight the history of BDSM in fiction and the BDSM scene itself, together illuminating why 50 Shades created such a unique case of backlash. I will then detail the actual backlash from the BDSM community, pulling from several statements representative of the community reaction in conjunction with evidence of how Fifty Shades impacted its readers’ interest in BDSM. This interest provided even more concrete validity to the BDSM community’s concerns: real relationships and real people’s bodies could be hurt due to Fifty Shades’ misinformation.
Impact of Fifty Shades
To discuss the series’ wild influence, it is necessary to discuss the origins of 50 Shades. Originally written by James under the pseudonym Snowqueens Icedragon on Fanfiction.net, the series infamously was born as a fanfiction of Stephanie Meyer’s own popular romance series Twilight (“Master of the Universe”). Called Master of the Universe, Grey then moved her story to her own site, FiftyShades.com, then took this version down before self-publication of the re-worked story with her own character names (“Master of the Universe”). Success followed immediately: during its heyday, “two copies of the first book sold every second; for a time, the UK ran out of silver ink, thanks to its use on the books’ covers” (Cian).
After reading, the book “shifted from erotic fiction to how-to guide” (Weisberg) for some fans who attempted bringing fantasy to life. In one survey of readers, “22% said the books had encouraged them to try (further) BDSM practices” (Deller and Smith). Though not wholly representative of the entire Fifty Shades readership with only 83 participants, anecdotal evidence slightly clarifies the series’ in-bedroom impact. Post-publication in 2012, Californian sex educator Robert Dunlap received “three or four requests a day from couples expressing an interest in” the BDSM practice (S. James). Dunlap found that requests from couples, and even from other sex educators wanting to learn proper coaching, were “happening now because of the book” (S. James). Reader enthusiasm also instigated larger workshops. Sex shop chain Pleasure Chest hosted “‘Fifty Shades of Pleasure’ workshops at its West Hollywood, Chicago and New York locations” after their accountant noted the novels’ rising sales (Keegan and Sperling). Similarly, at New York sex shop Babeland, over a hundred fans “crowded into the SoHo store for a class inspired by the books” at every workshop—a further private workshop was even hosted at a “celebrity’s apartment” (Weisberg). Demand was so high that it revived previously stagnant sex shop services. When interviewed in 2012, Babeland’s founder recounted: “We used to teach an introductory S & M class, but no one signed up. But I think we’ll have to start that up again” (Weisberg). Therefore, at least some of Fifty Shades audience pursued BDSM as a direct result of the books. However, despite professional introductions to the BDSM world, one participated noted that they still “learned more from the book” (Weisberg).
Sex toy companies also noted spikes in sales during the Fifty Shades craze. Referring again to Babeland, the store’s founder noted the initial spark of audience interest in BDSM began with sex toys: “I found out about the books because people kept coming into the store and asking about specific products—floggers, restraints, paddles” (Weisberg). A pleasure toy produced by LELO similar to one depicted in the books “jumped an astonishing 400 percent, growth [the company] attributes directly to the books” (Comella). Similarly, British sex toy producer Lovehoney’s Fifty Shades-inspired items tripled company profits over a year and lined shelves at Target; other items sold out before pre-order, even “items that you would not expect to be big sellers to mainstream audiences,” such as nipple clamps (Ford). Overall, a sector of the Fifty Shades audience was reading in the bedroom, so to speak.
The History of BDSM and Its Depiction in Romance
In 1785, the Marquis de Sade notoriously published his novel “Les 120 Journes de Sodome,” or in English The 120 Days of Sodom, which depicted the sadistic acts for which he was infamous (Lowrey). Almost one century later, Leopold von Sacher-Masoch published Venus in Furs, a story about a masochistic man enslaved by his female lover, originally the German “Venus im Pelz” (Lowrey). The depiction of kink in erotica was boosted for good by Pauline Rage’s “L’Histoire d’O” in 1954 and its submissive protagonist O (Lowrey). Though romance included bondage and sadomasochistic elements long before Fifty Shades—and indeed, similar books were even published during the heyday of its popularity—the series stands out due to the unique cultural explosion it caused. As stated by RT Book Reviews feature editor Mala Bhattacharjee, “‘Fifty Shades’ is no different from what’s already being sold. The major difference is that it has somehow become a part of current pop culture, of the zeitgeist. People won’t stop talking about it, so it perpetuates the sales, perpetuates the mythos, of this work as some sort of watershed for erotic fiction…In truth, romance fiction and erotica have been this ‘naughty’ for decades — naughtier, even” (Grinberg).
The history of the BDSM practice itself is a long one. In the 18th and 19th centuries, the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch both lent their names to sadism and masochism—their respective preferences (Lowrey). However, “depictions of whips, orgies, restraints and master/slave relationships” (Allcock) have been depicted in art as early as 4000 BC in Mesopotamian, Greek, and Egyptian cultures. Fast forwarding to more modern times, the first SM organization in the US was founded in 1971, prior to which “the SM community (‘the scene’) in the United States was underground, and mainly gay” (Newmahr 4). In the 1990s, the rise of the internet allowed for an expansion of the community, especially for straight women and college students: “for the first time, information about SM was accessible even to people who were reluctant to enter a public space and declare themselves curious” (Newmahr 5). Today, BDSM is both an exclusive subculture and the darling of the mainstream, a taboo that fascinates even those would never participate when it appears in popular media.
Critiques of 50 Shades
Despite its leather-clad exterior, the BDSM world touts such wholesome rudiments as “trust…and honest communication” (Trout). Therefore, the shaky relationship and ever-shifting boundaries shared by Grey and Steele Fifty Shades series raised a reaction from many members of the community, to whom the novels are anything from well-meaning but poorly searched to nothing short of abuse.
First, wherever they landed on the spectrum of appreciative to horrified, many members were particularly distressed over Grey’s play etiquette. BDSM/Kink/Fetish coach Emily Prior stated that “as a formulaic romance novel, [Fifty Shades] fits the formula perfectly,” but if a reader is delving into “it starts to give misinformation” (S. James). For example, the lack of aftercare, a period of affection given to the submissive after a session to avoid any actual psychological damage, is noted by several members: one states that Grey has a total “lack of BDSM manners. For starters, he gives no aftercare to Ana” (Dave). This is problematic because under Christian Grey’s so-called experienced name, readers may begin to follow thinly researched BDSM practices. Another similar technical issue with Grey’s BDSM technique is his use of zip ties. Professional Berlin dominatrix Lady Velvet Steel warns that they should not be used, contrary to scenes in Fifty Shades, because they “don’t have any give and can cut off the circulation and cause nerve damage” (Roxborough). Robert Dunlap, who interviewed hundreds of kink enthusiasts for a documentary, also criticized the safety of Grey’s play. A submissive’s limits are strict rules, he explained, and dominants will check in during sessions as boundaries are finalized: “Tell me during the process if you want to be hurt. Is it too hard? Is it too soft?” (S. James). Grey’s ignorance of this concept thus misaligns with Dunlap’s experience with true BDSM practice. Safety in Fifty Shades is further critiqued in one often referenced video, DepravedEros’ “A Dominant Reviews 50 Shades of Grey.” The review highlights that BDSM is always “super consensual,” including many safeguards (Depraved Eros). He claims make interactions much safer than vanilla sex (Depraved Eros), but they were missing from his consumption of the Fifty Shades stories. His emphasis on the sanctity of safewords is reflected in Jenny Trout, a submissive’s, own review: “he degrades her and dumbifies her for not using a safeword during a scene if she ends up crying, and even shaming her if she in fact does use it.” The critique is not that Grey does not use safewords—it is acknowledged by the community that he does introduce them—but that his use is messy and he does not adequately respect them. Finally, the idea of Grey’s BDSM contract was included. The exact type of contract was identified as Total Power Exchange, which affects a participant’s whole lifestyle at all time, said to be far less common than others though not inexistent (Roxborough). DepravedEros and Dave both confirmed that less binding written contracts are used for some arrangements, though not all, and verbal discussion is more common because boundaries are softer in thought than in action. The real issue was with the legal boundaries of the contract. One Quora user and sexual Dominant wrote, “I find one of the more galling aspects of the book is the way that the ‘contract’ Ana signs is somehow treated as legally binding, which BDSM contracts never are” (Hancock). This unrealism in Grey’s so-called experience with BDSM manners, as with the others discussed, could lead beginners unwittingly into corrupt relationships. Overall, James’ “lack of research” (Roxborough) was a theme running through many sources, leading the BDSM community to speak up lest people face serious harm all due to an author’s fantasy.
Another sector of critique sourced from the world of kink is harsher. Simply put, this opinion is that “Christian Grey is an abusive, Fake Dom” (Dave). To many, the story is not a romance but a horror story of a man forcing a victim into submission. Grey states at one point that he does not believe there is a “submissive bone” Steele’s body (E. James); Steele in the novel and BDSM practitioners both agree: “From the beginning, she clearly is not a masochist. She gets no pleasure from pain and torture, and yet he proceeds” (Dave). Grey’s forcefulness is contrasted with real Dom/sub dynamics. His power is real and fear-based, whereas “any dom/me who isn’t an actual abuser is fully aware that it’s the submissive who is in more control of the scene anyway. The scene is built around the submissive” (Hancock). A study on BDSM blogs summarized the responses they analyzed, saying Fifty Shades is unrealistic because rather than consensually, it “depicts the BDSM practitioners as…doing BDSM after having been violently forced into these practices by their partner” (Drdová). Together, these reactions distinctly raise an issue with the fact that Steele is not willing to submit thus is forced to through emotional abuse. Because “the book is stunningly clear” that Steele is not a willing Submissive, writes one BDSM community member, this “means we’re just reading a description of a woman being beaten” (Pervocracy). Additionally, Grey’s control tendencies bleed beyond their agreed play times. Many sources iterated that “he isn’t a dominant. He’s a stalker. He breaks into Anastasia’s house” (Roxborough). A vast part of the community seems worried that “the very real danger of abuse in the subculture” (Trout) will become normalized and end up hurting readers who do not know what they are getting into.
Two dominants noted that Grey is allowed to be a Fake dom and get “away with it because he’s handsome and rich” (Hancock). To them, Grey’s wealth allows him a free pass to being seen as a great dominant when he is actually the opposite. Lady Velvet Steel agreed, stating, “You can be poor and still be a great dominant. Money has nothing to do with having great sex” (Roxborough).
The issue of Christian Grey’s trauma also raised several eyebrows in the BDSM community. DepravedEros especially criticizes James’ representation of a Dom/sub relationship because Grey’s trauma and Steele’s reluctance make BDSM look “bad.” BDSM, he laments, is vastly about fun rather than something stemming from trauma—in fact, the connection of dominant and submissive personalities is “beautiful” (Depraved Eros). Lady Velvet Steel echoed the sentiment in her interview, saying, “I think Christian Grey should go to therapy and work things out before he starts any relationships with other women” (Roxborough). Though positive publicity for the BDSM community did arise from the series’ publication, the traumatic vein running through the stories turned sexual Submissive Nichi Hodgson off from this exposure: “I find EL James’ rendering of Christian Grey as a victim of adolescent sexual abuse troubling. [T]here are thousands of perfectly well-adjusted members of the BDSM community who simply enjoy kinky sex, with absolutely no underlying neurosis necessary” (“Just how realistic”). Not only did the trauma wrongly flavor peoples’ motivations to partake in BDSM, but for some, his past abuse dangerously excused his misuse of Steele under the guise of domination. One submissive going by Rabbit on Goodreads maintained: “mr grey is unstable and should not be domming anyone” (“Fifty Shades”). Similarly, Trout wrote of her dominant and husband that unlike Grey, “He wouldn’t blackmail me with his past emotional tragedies to try and shame me for using the safeguard we agreed upon.” To her, Grey’s trauma was a direct catalyst for his lack of responsible care over his naïve submissive.
Interestingly, previously vanilla readers’ interest and the BDSM world intersected occasionally, as seen in articles such as an interview with dominant Franklin Veaux in Men’s Health on advice for amateurs, republished on his personal blog as “Interview: So your girlfriend has read 50 Shades; now how do you start with BDSM?”. Veaux seemed to encompass the more mild opinion, as extracted from other sources that were compiled, of BDSM practitioners on the Fifty Shades franchise: “I realize that 50 Shades of Grey is credited with helping to popularize the idea of BDSM, but I don’t think it’s actually a very good introduction to the subject…many of the activities described in 50 Shades aren’t very safe. Still, it is helping to open a dialog about BDSM. If it helps open the door for people who ‘ve always wanted to explore spicing up their relationship but haven’t been able to figure out how, that’s awesome.”
It is important to note, after delving into the critical side, that some dominants’ or submissives’ reviews include an admission to what Fifty Shades has done to destigmatize their lifestyle to the broader public, just as Veaux does. These statements disclaim that, though the relationship is unhealthy and pure or borderline abuse, “It’s high time the worlds of bondage and discipline, dominance and submission got the positive publicity they deserve. So here’s to Fifty Shades of Grey, and many more novels like it” (“Just how realistic”). Lady Velvet Steele noted at the end of her interview that “the one positive thing I can say about the whole Fifty Shades of Grey phenomenon is that it has brought S&M out of the shadows. There used to be a lot of discrimination, people doing S&M were portrayed as pedophiles, as sick f—s. I don’t think 50 Shades is true S&M, but if it is introducing people to my world and helping them experience new pleasure, that can only be a good thing” (Roxborough). Ironically, the S&M story that many community members denounced for its unnecessary psychosis has, to some, reduced the psychosis associated with its subject matter in the real world.
Conclusion
Fifty Shades knocked BDSM into the minds and bedrooms of millions of readers worldwide. However, real BDSM practitioners ultimately took issue with Fifty Shades’ abuse-tinted representation of their community, specifically Grey’s trauma-motivated drive to Dom/sub dynamics, lack of play etiquette, and controlling tendencies. They were worried for their reputation but also, in parallel, for the safety of readers who were using Fifty Shades as a how-to guide. Thus, strong backlash from the BDSM community towards Fifty Shades illuminates a new side of romance: the side that can influence reality, not just culture. Increasing conversations are being had about the liberative side of romance fiction. How much research should we do for each story? What happens when we do not do this job adequately? Though BDSM is not a minority community in the traditional sense, as members are not particularly oppressed, this lesson can be brought forward in terms of the physical and psychological safety of readers. When new and exciting experiences are depicted in fiction, readers will want to partake; it is authors’ responsibility to direct this formative power positively, to use its magic carefully, knowing what exactly lies in their hands.
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