Ladies and gentlemen we have reached the halfway point!!! This summer has been so amazing it’s weird to imagine that this program is already half over. As I was contemplating blog topics I noticed that I kept thinking about the various realizations that I had over the past four weeks and felt I should share. So as advice for future Moxies and for my current Moxies, here are the top ten things you should never do while on the Moxie Program as told by a Moxie that has done all of these things.
- Come to love your other fellow Moxies…
Look, you’ve only got eight weeks with these ladies. Yes, you may be spending every waking moment with them but resist the urge to come to love them! It will only end in heartbreak. More likely than not you’re all different ages and majors. This is a recipe for disaster. Honestly you’ll probably never see them on campus after this summer and if you have rising juniors in the group most likely at least one will be abroad in the fall (looking at you April)! Creating a loving and meaningful relationship with these girls is like being lactose intolerant your entire life and then discovering the ridiculous amazingness of chocolate and all things dairy. IT’S A MISTAKE YOU WILL REGRET. Save yourself some pain and just treat them like robots. My advice would be to only communicate when absolutely necessary and limit your sentence lengths to three words.
- Realize you love New York City…
New York may be one of the most visited cities in the US but that does not mean you need to figure out why! Ever heard of ignorance is bliss? That applies here. You do not need to know why NYC is incredible. Really. More likely than not you are not going to be able to live in NYC and simultaneously be at Duke campus so you’ll just spend the rest of your scholastic year wishing 9th street near East Campus was 5th Avenue near Hu Kitchen, Tiffany & Co, and the Museum of Sex. For those of you thinking “why not just transfer universities?” shame on you for even considering that. Duke is home. So nah. You’ll have to deal with a long-distance relationship with The Big Apple.
- Discover amazing food places here…
If you know me well you would know that eating happens to be one of my favorite things to do. There are so many incredible food places here. You could probably go to a different eatery for every single meal for the rest of your life and still not hit all the amazing eateries in NYC. Its like they want you to fail… Better to only eat from those random food trucks and pretend like you aren’t living in one of the best places to eat in the country.
- Visit a museum…
Enrichment activities are important because they expands your horizons and make you more knowledgeable. However, once you visit one museum you will come to the same realization that I did: museums in NYC are incredible sources of enlightenment, knowledge, and history. You will suddenly develop this burning desire to visit all the museums that NYC has to offer (I see you Abby). Now let me tell you, its not going to happen. There are 83 museums total in all of NYC. You’ll need more than eight weeks to get the job done.
- Be enlightened about the patriarchy…
Once you learn what patriarchy actually means be prepared for the anger. To me I view the patriarchy as a system where we gave newborn baby boys a guaranteed gold bar while simultaneously gave newborn baby girls lottery tickets. But here’s the catch! Those lottery tickets are even less likely to be winners if you are a person of color, part of the LGBTQ community, part of a religion that is not Christian or Catholic, or if you are somehow in any shape or form not conforming to the societal standard! Women lose in the game of life before even being given a chance to play.
- Realize how your entire childhood was plagued with all kinds of oppressions…
You can never take back this moment of realization. Once the wool is pulled off you can’t go back and, it sucks. Of course I prefer an existence where I know and understand how things like racism, sexism, and ageism affect me but that does not take away from the fact that this new understanding ends up tainting some of fond childhood memories you may have. Like finally realizing why your teachers were so shocked that you a young minority woman was doing really well in a math class instead of the stereotypical English class.
- Become educated about the injustices of the world…
There. Are. So. Many. The hard part is coming to terms with the idea that coming on this DukeEngage program does not automatically turn you into Wonder Woman and allows you to defeat all the injustices that plague the world. You won’t all of a sudden attain the ability to educate all men on the patriarchy, stop those street harassers, and prevent any sort of domestic violence to occur. I’ve had to come to terms with being able to be happy with the little successes and understand that it’s the small things us interns do that help support the amazing work these NGOs are doing.
- Become addicted to running…
Before this summer, I hated running. I have a long history of getting hurt while running but, my roommates April and Abby adore running. They get up every single day and run. I would run… But only for maybe ten minutes and just enough to be able to pat myself on the back for being “healthy” that day. These girls run more than 3 miles sometimes! So I tried running for real while here and now I love it. The only problem is that I am super attached to running along the Harbor or the High Line and neither of those is located near Duke campus. I’m going to have to find a new favorite setting to run in. I guess it’s not the worst thing in the world. (This one’s not that bad. But everyone should run along the Harbor or the High Line at least once while you’re here. It’s beautiful!).
- Start to love trying new things…
After trying so many new things and eating so many new foods, I have officially gotten over my initial aversion to trying new things. I always struggled to get past that initial hesitation to try new things and now I find myself jumping in whole-heartedly. But now I think I’ve developed an addiction to trying new things because they are so readily available in this city. How am I going to satisfy this craving in Durham!? Maybe I’ll just eat all the random, weird food that proliferates the Whole Foods’ shelves…
- Love being a completely independent woman…
Now, now ladies… If you are coming into this program you can be feminist but, let’s not get carried away and start thinking that on top of being feminist we are also going to enjoy being independent! That’s crazy talk! What would our society do with you after that? You would no longer be conforming to the ideology that supports the patriarchy. I say, THIS IS HERESY! But honestly, New York City forces you to be incredibly independent. If you did not feel self-sufficient before, you definitely will after this summer!
If you just heed these warnings I’m sure you Moxies will leave this program unscathed without any battle wounds from fighting your way to understanding. Good luck!
Best wishes,
Raissa
HAHAHA. I loved this post. And we will definitely still find time to see each other back at school! I don’t know how I am going to adjust to life post – NY either. Hopefully we can work here after college 🙂