Duke Learning and Organization Development

Creating a culture of helping isn’t just about encouraging support—it’s about making sure the help given is actually, well, helpful. As a leader, your role is to shape how help is asked for, delivered, and appreciated. Here’s how.

Push for clarity first. Guide your team to clearly define the problem before they ask for support. Encourage them to explain what success looks like and what kind of help they need. Use questions like “What’s blocking your progress?” or “What outcome are you aiming for?” to steer them toward precision.

Normalize direct, specific requests. Vague requests waste time. Model clear communication by being direct when you need support—and encourage your team to do the same. Create psychological safety by praising clear asks, being transparent about your own needs, and framing collaboration as part of the job, not a favor.

Institutionalize follow-through. Helping doesn’t end when support is offered. Make it standard practice to close the loop. Encourage team members to show teammates how their help made a difference and acknowledge their contributions. This not only builds trust but gives you insight into your employees’ strengths for future collaborations.

Helping is a core part of work. But like all forms of collaboration, it’s a skill—one that requires practice, feedback, and support. When it comes to help, it’s actually not just the thought that counts.

References:
Harvard Business Review (2025, June 10) Colin M. Fisher, Julianna Pillemer, and Teresa M. Amabile: Research: When Help Isn’t Helpful

Everyone struggles to manage their emotions at times. It’s normal to experience negative feelings at work, and we can’t expect ourselves or others to leave those feelings at home. To manage them in a healthy way, here are three elements of emotional intelligence you need to develop.

Tap into your self-awareness. When strong emotions strike, tap into your self-awareness with this simple exercise. First, notice your body. Scan from head to toe. Are you tense? Where’s your energy level? Then check in with your thoughts. Are they loud or quiet? Clear or confused? Finally, identify your emotions. How pleasant or unpleasant are they? How intense are they? If you can, name the feeling.

Self-regulate using your breath. Taking a few minutes to slow down and lengthen your exhales will activate your parasympathetic nervous system and slow down your heart rate, reducing stress and shifting you from a heightened emotional state to a more relaxed one.

Find small moments to uplift others. Try to see every encounter at work as an opportunity to leave the other person feeling uplifted. Use appropriate compliments, smiles, or a simple, kind greeting to foster strong, productive relationships that will help boost your emotional well-being.

Managing negative emotions is crucial because they serve as signals that something in our lives needs attention or change. Acknowledging and addressing these feelings can lead to personal growth, improved mental health, and a better understanding of ourselves and our relationships.

References:
Harvard Business Review (2024, June 26) Emma Seppala: 3 Exercises to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence, According to Research

Your summer vacation was bliss: mornings at the beach, impromptu ice cream stops, and afternoons lost in a good book. But now you’re back at your desk, facing a mountain of messages and emails, and your vacation joy is fading. How can you regain momentum at work?

Ease back in. Expect the first days back to be tough. Set reasonable expectations and plan your reentry in advance. Leave extra time for your commute to reduce stress and be strategic about scheduling meetings. Start with small, manageable tasks to build momentum gradually.

Reconnect with what you love about work. Think about why you chose your job in the first place. Identify the parts you enjoy and prioritize them. This could be anything from brainstorming sessions to client interactions. Focusing on what brings you joy can rekindle your motivation.

Shift your perspective. Work and leisure aren’t mutually exclusive. Recognize that your job provides the means for your vacations and downtime. Embrace the idea that being productive can complement your personal life and contribute to your overall well-being.

Reassess if necessary. If you’re still struggling after a few weeks, consider whether the job is still right for you. Vacations offer time for reflection. If you find yourself unhappy, explore other options—without making impulsive decisions.

Work-life balance is crucial for maintaining both physical and mental health, as it helps reduce stress, prevent burnout, and enhance overall well-being. Achieving this balance allows individuals to manage their professional responsibilities while also prioritizing personal interests and family needs, leading to greater job satisfaction and productivity.

References:
Harvard Business Review (2024, July 9) Rebecca Knight: Post-Vacation Blues? Here’s How to Cope