Author: Emily Sun

See You Again

July 21, 2019 / Emily Sun / 0 Comments

Somehow, eight weeks have already passed, and we’re just two days away from leaving Korea and going home. It seems so strange to me. Where did all of the time go so quickly? It makes me sad and regretful that we’re already going to go. I wish there was more that I could have done, more time spent with the kids, more time that I could have spent learning more about this country. I’m the worst at goodbyes, and I know that when I get on the plane on Tuesday, this goodbye will be a hard one.

But before we get carried away into all of the “The Ends”, I wanted to reflect on the last few weeks.

Jiguchon: Middle School

Though I said goodbye to all of the elementary schoolers in my last post, we still had two more weeks with the middle schoolers. In the last two weeks, I think I became most attached to the kids. I think out of all of the goodbyes, this was the hardest.

The last day of middle school, we spent our time saying goodbye to our students. Nikki and I said goodbye to our English class. I’ll miss them a lot. Even though Jongsu and Jooeun only spoke Korean, I felt happy that they were in our class, and I felt like we got a little closer. Though I don’t know how much we were able to teach them for English, I hope that we were able to complete the middle school teacher’s goal of connecting with them and motivating them.

The middle school class performed for us. Their band (the one that we had heard every single day practicing during lunch time while we were still at Jiguchon) performed Way Back Home. The whole class sang along. The middle school teacher had joked about how they were all terrible singers, but I nearly cried during that performance. I’ll treasure that memory for a long time. We decided to also dance for the students, and then it was finally the hard part. Each of the teachers gave a speech to the middle school class about their thoughts on our time here, and our final goodbyes. Erin and I translated to Korean and Chinese. I’ll only talk about what I told the kids, but if you’re curious what everyone else talked about, I’m sure that if you read their blogs they might have mentioned it.

I think the first thing I told the kids was how much they meant to me. How grateful I was that they allowed me to be their teacher. How thankful I was that they had come to our classes full of energy, how they had always tried their best. How happy I was that they had showed us so much love. In some ways, I slowly began to think of them as younger brothers and sisters. They were so close in age to us, and we were getting so close to each other. Teaching middle school and getting to know the students was the best part of this trip. In many, many ways, Duke Engage South Korea was really tough. Being in this country not being able to speak or understand the language, being so far away from home, having to constantly be lesson planning and doing all of this other work I have to take care of—it really was tough. It exhausted me. But, what got me through it was the kids, particularly the middle schoolers. A lot of time, they were the highlight of my day. They motivated me to get out of bed in the morning when I was exhausted. When I became frustrated that I couldn’t speak the language, I thought about how they were going through the same thing, and it made me feel a little more hopeful, a little less lonely. They brought so much happiness and joy and hope into my life.

But beyond telling them how grateful I was, I told them what I hoped for them. How I truly believed in them, and that I thought they could achieve anything that they put their minds to. How I hoped that they would pursue their dreams, whatever that may be. I told them that though we would be far apart from each other, that they should know that we would always be somewhere, believing in their futures.

Cliché, I know. But I truly meant it.

Goodbyes are always tough. We went around and hugged and shook hands with all of the students. Nayoung and a lot of the other girls cried (and of course, I did too). I’ll miss them so much. And since I did it for the elementary schoolers, I wanted to have one (brief) final shoutout.

To Jiyoung, Nayoung, Soryeong, and Yeoeun (the four girls I got closest to):

Thank you for all of the time we spent together. For all of the laughter in our special English class, and all of the time we spent learning. I know the four of you all have hopes and dreams. Jiyoung, to be a social worker. Nayoung, a translator. Soryeong, a model. And Yeoeun, to go to college. I believe that you all have the skills, motivation, and drive to achieve your goals. So don’t give up. I’ll be cheering for you!

texted me later, after we left. I just wanted to share what she said (translated from Chinese) just because it really meant a lot to me:

“Teacher, these six weeks you really worked hard. Even though we’ve already separated, I still feel like our hearts are linked together. I trust that we will see each other again in the future. I will work hard and study to reach my goals, and I will think about you especially.

I have really gained a lot of courage. When I grow up and come to America, I will come find you. I hope that you live your life happily, and that everything goes smoothly in your life. I truly am thankful for you.”

I’ll end Jiguchon Middle School on that last note. Jiguchon, I’ll miss you.

Woorideul:

In many ways, Woorideul was much harder than Jiguchon. Our time was much shorter, the students were much older. My students happened to be around my age, but I know there were many students who were significantly older than the rest of us. Luckily, the language barrier was gone, since all of my students spoke Chinese. But in the short time that we had, I wonder how much we were able to teach them.

The students I had reminded me of the middle school students though. Both of my classes spoke Chinese the best, and then some could understand Korean. Their English levels varied a lot though. They spoke to each other all in Chinese, since that was what they were most comfortable with.

But regardless, we had fun as we learned. The students enjoyed playing the games that I had. We had good conversation about their favorite movies, and their favorite shows. I learned about their hometowns in China, and their favorite foods that they liked there. A lot of them missed home, understandably. They all seemed so excited when they were showing me pictures of food that I had never heard about, but they all urged me to try. Though our time was short and I couldn’t learn much, we were happy in the time we spent together.

In that sense, it was much easier to say goodbye to Woorideul. They gave us letters thanking us for the two weeks we spent together, and we exchanged hugs.

Duke Engage South Korea

So… where are we now? Now that this program is ending, my heart feels heavy. There were so many amazing memories I made on this trip. I met so many bright and talented students who I’ll miss dearly. I got to learn more about a country that will have a special place in my heart from now on. I was challenged—physically, mentally, emotionally. I feel like I have grown in so many ways. From so much failure and emotional turmoil, I have been forced to reflect on myself as a teacher and a person. The lessons that I learned will follow me forever, and for that I’m grateful.

Though we bickered and fought at times, I really had a great time being around all of you. Thank you for all of the amazing memories and the fun times. We taught together, ate together (or at least tried to), and got to know this country better. We laughed over the stupidest things together, and we made some very questionable decisions (sardines my goodness). Thank you for being there for me when things got rough. I’m grateful to have gotten to know each and every one of you. To the friendships that I’ve made, to the people that I’ve come to love and cherish, to the memories that will last me for a lifetime. It’s been an unforgettable experience.

I’d say that I’ll miss you all, but I’m sure that I’ll see you again.

Love,

Emily

Goodbye, Jiguchon

June 30, 2019 / Emily Sun / 0 Comments

Just two hours ago, our time at Jiguchon came to an end. We said our final goodbyes to the teachers and students, walking through each classroom one last time. Gave a few last minute hugs, walked down the stairs, and then closed the door to the school that for the past month that we called our school and home.

But I get ahead of myself. So much happened in the past two weeks that it would be a shame to only focus on the goodbyes of today.

Let’s start with week 3: 예비반

The multicultural class was a handful. It was helpful to have all eight of us in the same classroom because we got to have two teachers per table group of 3-4, so we had a lot of interaction with the individual kids. But at the same time, it was a pretty big challenge still. Unlike the other classes, where everyone speaks primarily Korean, the multicultural class’s Korean and English levels fluctuated drastically. Some kids (like Eunice), were really good at English, while others could barely understand anything we said. Almost all of the kids spoke Chinese, which was a relief (at least for me), since I could finally understand what most of the kids were saying. But at the same time, there were also kids who couldn’t speak Korean or Chinese. Manse only spoke Mongolian, and Forjune had better English than most, but was fluent in Thai. Crossing those two language barriers were a struggle, but everyone tried their best to use Google Translate to talk to them and make sure that they understood the instructions.

In many ways, the multicultural classroom reminded me of teaching the middle schoolers. We did our best to teach in a mix of English, Chinese, and Korean. But even so, Lisa and Hanly (the two oldest girls who had good Chinese and good Korean) would translate to the other younger kids instructions, or helping out the other kids when they didn’t understand. Even though the kids were a mix of ages and grades, it was incredibly heartwarming to see how much they cared about each other and wanted each other to do well. Yes, they made fun of each other. Yes, during some of the games they would be upset when their classmates messed up for their team (and of course, we talked to them about being more supportive). But at the end of the day, when I think back to the multicultural class, what I remember most is how close they all were. Despite language and age differences, they were friends. Hanly would hug Kitty (the youngest and smallest girl in our class) like she was her older sister. When Mijoo was crying over losing a game for her team, Cassie went up to draw together with her at the blackboard until she felt better.

Really, the kids had so much love.

In some ways, I felt more connected to the multicultural class. Maybe it’s because I could actually speak to more of them in a language I was more comfortable with, I don’t know. But the kids became so attached. Even after we left the multicultural class to teach the next grades, Mijoo and Cassie and Kitty would come without fail to visit us in the 2^nd grade classroom. They’d pull me over to try to eat lunch with them, and cutely pout and whine if I sat anywhere else.

But what amazed me most about the multicultural class was how hopeful they were. Even though they were working on learning both Korean and English, they were still willing to learn. They still gave their all to us in the one week that we got to teach them. And I’m so thankful for that.

Two kids really stood out to me that I wanted to call attention to in this posting: Eunice and Forjune. Both of them are probably only 12 years old. But when we asked them what they wanted to do in the future, Eunice said that she wants to be a businesswoman and Forjune said that she wants to be a teacher in Thailand. Hearing that, I really was so amazed. Most of the other kids at Jiguchon have no clue what they want to be in the future. Even the middle schoolers, when I ask them what they want to do in the future, they have no clue. I really think that it’s a beautiful thing that Eunice wants to be a businesswoman and Forjune wants to be a teacher. I truly believe in them and their abilities, and I hope that they can achieve their dreams. We made sure to tell them that we thought they could do it. They shook their heads and laughed, but I hope they know that the eight of us will be cheering them on, no matter where we are.

Week 4: 2^nd grade

I think we all expected 1^st and 2^nd grade to be the easiest to manage. At least I did. For some reason, I assumed that as we moved down to teach the younger grades, they would just become better-behaved. But of course, 2^nd grade was probably the hardest grade we taught so far.

The classroom dynamic was probably the most difficult part, particularly with the girls. Though they were all only nine years old, they formed cliques. It was pretty rough. Two of the girls would exclude the other girls that they didn’t like. We tried our best to stop it, but it was hard when they wouldn’t want to hold hands with some of the other girls, or refuse to play with them. Even though we would explain to them how important it was to include everyone, they didn’t seem to understand.

The varying levels was also pretty hard. Seiya barely understood any English (or Korean I think? She had trouble understanding directions). The three boys (James, Hansel, and Peter) all had pretty good English. Or at the very least, they learned fairly quickly compared to the rest of the class. Whenever we played games, we had to split them up so that the teams would be more even. We ended up splitting up the class sometimes to teach vocabulary, which helped a lot. Before, the three boys would just shout out the answer and the rest of the class would just repeat what they said without actually learning. So splitting up helped a lot.

The second graders definitely learned the slowest out of all of the classes that we taught though. They picked up vocabulary slower, and remembered things a lot less. In the one week that we taught them, I don’t know how much they learned or how much they retained. I think we were able to reinforce a lot of the alphabet and introductions (I think all of the kids can now successfully say “My name is ____,” “I am nine years old” and things like that). But I wish that we could have more time with this class since they learned so much slower.

But despite all of the challenges, I feel like I got close to some of the 2^nd graders. They were definitely the wildest and goofiest class, and I found the three boys were easiest to get close to. They liked to play games with me (a lot of them ending with me losing and getting flicked on the forehead as a result).

I’ll miss them.

Middle School

Every week, middle school gets better. Out of all of the kids in the school, I feel the most connected to the students in middle school, at least the ones that I work directly with. The classroom dynamics in the middle school continue to amaze me. I can’t even begin to convey how supportive they are of each other. Pavel (the Russian speaker) still struggles with Korean, yet the kids still try their best to support him and translate what they can. When Yahan doesn’t understand what Nikki or I am saying in English, Jongsu and Jooeun jump in and try to translate to Chinese or Korean. Even though they kind of ruin our intention to challenge his listening abilities, I still think it’s so sweet that they try their best to help him.

Aside from that, we tried something new this week. After talking to the middle school teacher, she wanted us to just talk to the kids about our experiences and our lives to try to inspire them. So we broke up into groups of the kids that we had connected the best with. I had Nayoung (the girl who wants to be a translator in the future), Boram (one of the girls that I teach for English), and Yeoeun (another girl that I help teach English to when I teach the English elective class). I opened the class time to just questions that they had. Boram had so many. She asked about almost everything, ranging from colleges in America to everyday American teenage life. I tried to answer her questions as best as I could. I asked them about their dreams and whether they wanted to go to college. They all said yes, though one of them said that they didn’t think that they could. I tried not to prod about why, because she didn’t want to talk about it. But thinking about that makes me really sad. I hope that they all have the opportunity to go to college if they can. Their teacher said that these students have some sort of a special tract that makes it slightly easier for them to get into college, so I hope that she can go if she wants to.

The girls also opened up to me about their stories. They talked to me about how they had all ended up from China to Korea, and how hard it was for them to adjust. Some of them traveled by train for days, following their parents. I was touched that they trusted me enough to tell me their stories. Each of these students have so much going on in their lives, and so much baggage that they’re carrying. I don’t know what I can do in the position I am in to help them in their situations. But at the very least, I’m glad that I had the chance to listen.

Goodbye, Jiguchon

Though we still have to come back to teach middle school for two more weeks, today marked the end of our time at Jiguchon with the elementary schoolers. We had the final closing ceremony today. Thomas rapped “See You Again” with our 5^th grade Martha. Nikki, Erin, and I danced with some of the girls from all of the grades to “Everyday” that we practiced during many classroom breaks throughout our time here. And then all of us danced to something that Shey, Erin, and Nikki choreographed. The kids seemed to love it. And then we gave our closing remarks. Standing in front of all of the kids, I had so much to say. I wanted to tell them how thankful I was to all of them for our time here, how grateful I was for all of the love that they showed us, and how much happiness they had brought into our lives. I wanted to tell them that I was so proud of them, and that I knew that they could go great places. But, in the end, all I could choke out without crying was a few short sentences.

After that, the kids came up to take pictures with us and say their goodbyes. To say the least, it was an emotional time. The kids came up and started giving us hugs while crying. Seeing them cry, most of us just started breaking down crying with them. My 5^th graders (Annie, Sophia, and Martha) sat on the ground crying. The girls in the multicultural class (Cassie, Kitty, Mijoo) swarmed me in a mob of tears and hugs. Miyeon sat on Thomas’s lap and sobbed. Nancy came up to me and said that she would miss me. I cried really hard. It’s hard to describe the emotions that were running through all of our heads at the time. All of the gratefulness, all of the happiness, all of the bittersweet feelings.

Finally, I just wanted to close off this post and my time at Jiguchon with a message to the kids who have made this experience for me.

To the kids at Jiguchon:

First of all, thank you. Thank you for allowing me to be your teacher during these four weeks. Thank you for giving me your time, and your attention, and your 100%. Thank you for all of the smiles, for all of the laughter, for all of the amazing memories that I’ll carry with me for the rest of my life. But most importantly, thank you for all of the love that you all showed me. You all were truly the best part of my day. In all of the stress and struggles that are going on in my life, thank you for showing me your love. As silly as this sounds, seeing all of you reminded me that there is good in the world. You showed me that even in the struggles that you all face in your daily lives, that you’re all able to still find happiness in the simplest of things. More than anything I gave you all, you all inspired me. To become a better teacher. To find different ways to communicate. To approach the world with the same optimism, happiness, and love that you all do.

Now for each of my classes.

To my 5th graders, thank you for welcoming me into this school with open arms. It was incredibly terrifying to suddenly become a teacher, on top of not being able to speak Korean. Thank you for all of your patience despite all of the mistakes that I made. Particularly to Annie, thank you for making me feel welcome in your class. Thank you for waving me over to sit with you all during lunch on the first day when I had no idea where to go, and for bringing me over to learn how to dance “Everyday” with you all.

To my 4^th graders, thank you for all of the energy. You all tired us out so much, but it meant so much that you all directed that passion into the classroom activities that we did. Even during break times, you all would drag me and Nikki to start dancing with you all. And in the end, we were able to join you all to dance “Everyday” for the closing ceremony. To Nancy, thank you for including us in this and making sure that we learned the dance. I could see how much effort that you put into leading the kids to learning the dance, and I appreciated all of the time that you put in to creating this special opportunity for us.

To the 3^rd graders who I never got to teach, thank you for letting me into your class. I would come into your classroom during break times to just breathe and rest from all of the energy that was happening in the 4^th grade class. Eventually, you let me into your classroom and played with me too. Particularly to Miyeon, thank you for being like a little baby sister to us. To Mandy, though I always complained, I loved it when you dragged me everywhere to play the plane game with you. Though my arms would fall off as I carried you around and spun you everywhere, it made me happy to make you laugh and scream.

To the multicultural class, thank you for all of the love. For all of the love that you showed each other, and all of the love that you showed the eight of us. Though my Chinese wasn’t the best and I had to rely on Google translate sometimes, you all still were so patient with me, and so open. During breaks, you all would come up to me and grab onto my arms and whine to me about this or that. To Mijoo, thank you for the drawing you painted for me. I’ll treasure it forever. I hope that you will continue to keep smiling and drawing even when things get hard for you. To Forjune and Eunice, you two have great futures ahead of you as teachers and businesswomen. I truly believe in you.

To the 2^nd graders, thank you for being a great class to end with. Though the material was a little challenging for you all, thank you for trying your best. For the last forty minutes, you all mobbed us with tickles and yells to take pictures. I wish that we could spend more time with you all since our time was cut short by the assembly, but I know that the teachers of Jiguchon will continue to make you all into great students.

And most importantly, to all of the teachers of Jiguchon. Thank you for letting us meet your students for a week, and for letting us teach your class. Thank you for all of the help that you gave us. But most of all, thank you for all of the time that you gave and continue to give to all of these kids. Every day, we saw how much these kids love and respect you all. Thank you for being our role models and theirs.

Jiguchon, I’ll miss you. Thank you for all of the love.

Until next time,

Emily

Do you speak Korean? Go fish.

June 16, 2019 / Emily Sun / 0 Comments

Some reflections from the first two weeks:

In many ways, my time in Korea so far has challenged me. Going into this summer, I was really excited to teach English to the kids at Jiguchon. I imagined the kids learning new vocab, having fun during our classes, and chatting with them during lunchtime. Yet, the first few days were incredibly frustrating. Because I’m not fluent in Korean, when Erin or Thomas would explain things to the kids in Korean, I felt like I had nothing I could add. During lunch, when Annie and Martha (two of our cutest 5^th graders) and the other girls in our class would talk to each other in Korean, I felt unable to join their conversation. When I tried to talk to Nancy (one of our lovely 4^th graders) in English and ask her what she was doing over the weekend, she just looked at me with a blank stare and a confused face. I felt isolated and useless, and worse of all, I felt like I had failed as their teacher.

But as time has passed, I’ve slowly began to realize that maybe these frustrations are what are allowing me to think about the kids and what some of them may be going through. Particularly in the middle school, there are so many kids who speak only Chinese. Their Korean isn’t advanced enough to understand what their homeroom teacher says when she gives instructions, and as a result, the kids who can speak both Chinese and Korean translate for them. The teacher says something, and there’s almost a ripple effect of whispers as the students translate to their Chinese friends what she’s saying. Seeing this during the first few days of middle school has really made me start to think about these kids beyond their education. How do these particular kids feel not being able to speak Korean? Not just restricted to during school, but in their day to day life. In some ways, feeling so isolated and confused all of the time helped me understand the kids. I know that for me, it’s been really hard to not be able to talk to people or understand people. This influx of feelings from these past few days really makes me wonder whether these kids who can only speak Chinese or Vietnamese or Russian feel the same frustration and isolation that I sometimes felt. And while I will only have to get through the next few months in a country where I don’t speak the language, some of these kids will live here the rest of their lives. Thinking about this has made me realize that this Duke Engage trip is more than just teaching English. It’s also about helping the kids adjust socially, and helping them feel more comfortable in the classroom. Talking to the homeroom teacher, we realized that that was exactly what she wanted us to do. Rather than focusing on teaching the middle schoolers English, she expressed the hope that we would be able to connect with the kids and act as role models. She wants us to inspire them and nurture their hopes and dreams.

With all of that background info, here’s how week three went.

In terms of elementary school, the classroom dynamic was so much different. Last week, I taught 5^th grade with Thomas and Shey. 5^th grade was a small class—the kids were energetic, but not too rowdy. This week, I taught 4^th grade with Erin, Martin, Daniel, and Nikki, and it was a lot (to say the least). It was only eleven kids, but I felt like their energy bounced off each other and amplified when they were all together. They always want to play games, and they’re so competitive. We used that to our advantage though. The kids pick up vocab really fast, so we played lots of games like Pictionary and bingo and charades. I think one challenge has been the fact that the kids are at such different levels. They’re all in the same grade, but some kids have trouble reading, while other kids like Wendy and Calvin seem to already know what we’re teaching. Seeing how different their English (and Korean) abilities were really made me wish that there were some better way that we could cater to their individual needs. Each kid really learns in such a unique way that it’s hard to find activities that engage all of them. The boys (like Hanshin and Junhyun) only really love playing games. Otherwise, they’re not really interested in other things (like drawing, or writing). The girls (like Wendy and Lili) have the patience to do more challenging activities like one of the writing games that Daniel came up with. It really made me wish that there were more classrooms, or some other way to split up the class more effectively. What we ended up having to do was split up into small groups to do activities so that there were more one-on-one teacher and student interactions. It worked out fine, but sometimes I wish that there was more that we could do somehow.

In terms of the middle school, it’s been a little better. Nikki and I (being the only two Chinese speakers in the group) have been teaching all of the kids who only speak Chinese. Last week was pretty rough. The kids weren’t really interested in what we were teaching (or learning English), and it’s been hard to get them excited. We didn’t really know what their homeroom teacher wanted us to do either, so that was a big problem. But after talking to her and hearing what she had said, we’ve tried to adapt our curriculum to try to connect with the kids. Particularly with the class that Nikki and I teach, it’s been difficult. The homeroom teacher herself told us that the hardest children to work with were the ones who spoke almost no Korean and no English. Because they don’t really understand what the teacher is saying most of the time, I think she feels like they’ve gotten used to not participating in class since they can’t understand. Hearing this, it became Nikki’s and my goal to simply get the kids to participate. I started teaching and speaking to the kids in Chinese so that they would feel more comfortable. Slowly, I think it’s worked. Yahan and Boram definitely seemed more comfortable after they realized that we were explaining things in Chinese. They’ve gradually been participating more in Chinese, and as the days go by, they’ve been using more English. For last week’s class, we taught them how to play Go Fish. It was the first time that I saw them so excited for any of our activities, which made me so happy to see. They got to practice their numbers (Yahan struggled a little, but we wrote the numbers on the board), and they also got to practice their English (it was really funny when Boram asked Jooeun “Do you have a ___?” three different times and he had all of the cards she needed).

In terms of how I’ve been doing this week compared to the beginning, it’s been getting better. Not being able to speak Korean has challenged me to find other ways to communicate with the kids. I’ve been picking up a lot more Korean (I can kind of speak now? Maybe?) and I’ve learned to just gesture and find different ways to explain things. I’ve started to teach lessons (instead of just floating around the room and helping individuals) and it makes me hopeful and excited. Every day gets a little better than the day before. I’m doing my best as their teacher, and that’s all that I can ask for.

It’s definitely a learning process. Not just for them, but also for us.

-Emily