Telling Stories

When I first arrived here, I immediately loved the beauty of Egyptian culture. The incredible kindness and insuppressible hope of the people. The level of political dedication and public engagement. The natural beauty of the pyramids, of the view of the Nile and Cairo Tower from our apartment, of the ancient mosques and institutes of learning. The relaxed, communal lifestyle of Garden City.

We’ve been disappointed by the media’s and Western culture’s negative portrayal of events on the ground over here. But over the last couple weeks, as we returned to work and class after our long house arrest, we’ve started to get a sense of just how much is truly going on behind the scenes – in Egypt, in Cairo, in Garden City, at our workplaces, and even within our own little group. The emotional and physical toll of such sustained, intense effort is certainly becoming a factor, for me at least. I’ve come to see that there are some real, non-trivial problems with the culture here.

How do we reconcile that negativity with the inherent beauty of Egypt?

I’ve always thought that the stories we tell, the songs we sing, the pictures we paint about the world shape, in turn, the way we approach it. Over the last couple weeks, I’ve been thinking a lot about stories. We’ve heard a lot of them in our time here. Some are tragic. All are hopeful. I’d like to share a few with you.

“I will not be driven into submission”

A couple weeks ago, journalist Natasha Smith was sexually assaulted near Tahrir in the frenzy following the announcement of the presidential election results.  Her blog post describing the horrific experience attracted widespread attention, particularly in the Western media. I’m fortunate enough to be isolated from this often violent, objectifying cultural attitude towards women, but it is a constant pressure on other members of our group.

Ms. Smith’s account describes a physical and emotional pain that I can’t even begin to wrap my mind around. But the language with which she ultimately chooses to characterize such unacceptable violence is that of hope, defiance, and assurance, not that of anger or weakness. She refuses to play the submissive, inferior role into which the mob tried to force her.

“My dad, my mom, and I”

One day this week at Ana el-Masry, our primary service partner, one of our little friends wandered into the English classroom, where I was relaxing with Amanda and MJ during a break in classes. I’m not quite sure where he was supposed to be at the time, but he was just drawing quietly, so we just enjoyed his company. After a while, he proudly showed us his creation. It was a simple crayon drawing echoing those produced by children all over the world – a house, a living room, and a family. He pointed out who all the people were: “Ana, wa baba, wa mama!” Him, his mother, and his father.

The staff at Ana el-Masry don’t know where his parents are. He may well be an orphan.

I told him “Gameel!” – beautiful – while trying to hold back tears. It was an incredibly poignant moment, one of the most powerful from a very emotionally moving trip.

We’ll never know this sweet child’s whole story, and it’s difficult to read too much into his mental state from an isolated incident. But it’s safe to say that his experience with family has been incredibly difficult at best. And yet, he knows what that loving relationship looks like, and wants that life for himself. It’s a tragic story, but one filled with longing for something better.

“We forgot everything”

Finally, and in a larger sense, I’ve been fascinated with how Egyptians have spoken of their experience of revolution in my conversations so far. They speak of the few months from last year when the Mubarak regime was overthrown as a time when the people forgot everything and turned out into the streets en masse. Their fear of the government was suddenly irrelevant. It’s an unparalleled tale of popular empowerment.

The promise of the revolution has been fulfilled, at least in part and certainly in the minds of many Egyptians, with the election of Mohammad Morsi as the country’s first ever democratically elected president. But when Egyptians tell this story, they often mention that they haven’t quite been able to recapture the same level of public engagement over the last several months. The military establishment still holds a significant amount of power over the current and future activities of the government, and the runoff election between two extreme candidates led to widespread disillusionment.

Despite all this, though, every time I’ve heard this story described, it’s told with extreme fondness, determination, and hope. No matter how much the extreme poles of the Muslim Brotherhood and the SCAF are criticized, that knowledge that the people can shape their nation for the better is always hovering just beneath the surface. And the more they remind themselves of that possibility, the more real it becomes.

A song of hope

It’s very easy to look at all the personal and cultural weaknesses of Egypt and label the entire country as somehow backwards, violent, or underdeveloped. And there’s some truth to those characterizations. But to do so is to ignore the massive cultural complexity at work here. There is more than one Egypt – there’s hardship, injustice, and struggle of all kinds, just as in any nation.

The common thread in these stories isn’t just adversity – it’s hope. To me, that’s even more inspiring than the superficially apparent, beautiful aspects of the culture. Understanding this is more than just realizing the hidden beauty of Egypt – it’s the recognition of a theme that can be applied to all cultures, no matter how ostensibly disparate. People the world over are striving for something better, and we’ve witnessed that firsthand here in Egypt.

I hope that when I tell stories about struggle in my own life, I can sing a song of hope, craft a narrative of defiance, and paint a picture of a better future.

A Patriot in Cairo

As I write this post, my family is probably eating Watermelon, enjoying fireworks, relaxing on the lake and enjoying the parade I mentioned in my first post. But I am miles away on one of my favorite American Holidays, in a place that is tasting its first bite of the democracy which I have been enjoying my entire life.  However, today I experienced Independence Day in a new way.

The day started with the normal Cairo smells of cigarette smoke, smog, Tamiyaa, and Fresh Croissants instead of the smell of hamburgers and apple pies which normally accompany this day in my hometown. The children at Ana El-Masry had no idea that the American students in their midst were feeling homesick, and continued to be energetic and adorable as usual.

For our secondary NGO’s AlKayan and AlResala, we wanted to do something special to celebrate the day and give them a taste of American culture. All day yesterday, the girls in our group cut and peeled apples while I tried rather unsuccessfully to make pie crust without measuring cups or a rolling pin. My estimates turned out to be wrong and I ended up smashing it into the pie plate like pizza dough only to find out that the oven in our room didn’t work. However, all turned out well after I went to the guys apartment to use their electric oven.

All this effort definitely paid off when we arrived to see a series of signs in our classroom at  AlKayan reading “Happy Independent Day.” We laughed and thanked them for being so thoughtful and proceeded to tell them all about the holiday and why we celebrated it including a list of vocabulary words like patriotism, barbecue, fireworks, and independence.     We were comparing the independence of our two countries and discussing patriotism as a love for one’s country when Moataz, the worker at AlKayan who runs the English classes, said “Before January 25 (the recent Egyptian Revolution), from 1973 when we were freed from colonial rule until January, we never felt for our country what you feel for America. We did not talk about it the way you talk about your country.”

To say the least, I was shocked. We’ve been in Cairo for over 4 weeks now and we’ve seen Egyptians so passionate about their country, so hungry for change, and so full of patriotism, but this passion, like democracy, is a new concept here, one which makes me appreciate my homeland even more.

I’ve always heard that DukeEngage in Cairo makes you realize your “American-ness,” but before now I’ve never really thought about that aspect of this experience. I cannot imagine not loving my country, my home. Even though I may sometimes see the flaws in the system, the ability to see these flaws and the will and ability to change them is what democracy is about. Now that I’ve seen democracy at its birth, seen the realization of flaws turn to will and blossom into change, I am even more proud than ever to be an American.

An Issue of Power

Every day since getting to Cairo, whether I’m talking with our DukeEngage group, walking down the streets of Qasr el Aini, or playing with the children at Ana El Masri, I have thought about sexual harassment. And I’m not alone in this: 83% of Cairo women and 98% of foreign women in Cairo say that they have been sexually harassed. Ninety-eight. Our DukeEngage group expected the worst of the worst: I envisioned constant man-handling and full-on stalking. So our group was pleasantly surprised that most of the sexual harassment was limited to staring, creepy smiles, hissing, and a few un-wanted conversations. And we have all joked about it, laughed it off, and proclaimed how it’s all nothing. How it doesn’t matter. How it’s not a big deal.

But at what point can you be compliant about this? Why should I be scared that a friendly smile could lead a man to take advantage of me? Why do I force myself to stare at the ground while I walk, in order to avoid inappropriate gazes? Why should I be afraid that showing my collarbone sends men the wrong signal? Why should I feel in danger while only walking with girls at night? Why has every single girl in our group experienced some form of shocking sexual harassment? Why does this culture exist, and isn’t going along with the culture the same as quietly accepting it as just and unchangeable? I know that there are some outlets, including HarassMap, where Egyptian women are speaking out against this sexual harassment and misogyny.There are also some incredible women, such as Mona El Tahawy who are actively fighting for women’s rights in Egypt, but are all of these things enough?

Women protest against sexual harassment in Tahrir in June. Source: msnbc

I realized the extent of the media’s influence over the Egyptian perception of American women when the women we work with at Al Kayan were surprised to see that we are “normal” girls, and “not like the ones in the movies.” But what else, besides education, can fix the problem of sexual harassment? Every day, I think about these questions and rack my brain, research on the Internet, and ask professors for the answers. But a simple answer doesn’t exist. My frustration has been building and growing over these past four weeks. But then last week, it erupted. On June 24, a British journalist published a blog post detailing her horrendous sexual assault near Tahrir Square on the day Morsi was announced president.

Most of the comments on her blog post send her apologies and describe how brave she is for writing about her sexual assault. But some of the comments blame her for the assault and accuse her of lying and fabricating details of the assault. One comment in particular struck a chord: “You are the biggest liar I have ever seen. This article is completely full of shit and it is 100% not true you lying attention seeker. I do not sympathize with you or any of the idiots who believe this is true. Why are you trying to make my country look bad you ungrateful bitch.”

Reading this almost brought me close to tears of anger. I couldn’t believe that somebody would actually say this. But what frustrates me even more, and what pushes me over the edge, is that I’ve heard this type of victim-blaming before: people made these types of comments responding to columns in Develle Dish about sexual assault or the column published in the Chronicle in March. This victim-blaming, and the resulting hopelessness, weakness, and frustration of women, are not only endemic to Egypt, to the Middle East, or to Muslim societies. This is a global problem. Whether discussing sexual assault, sexual harassment, or women’s rights, all of these topics relate to one issue: the issue of power.

The power of men to sexually assault women in Tahrir. 

The power of men to objectify women through staring and hissing.

The power of men to get any job, wear anything, and go anywhere without being subjected to judgment.

I know that changing this power imbalance in any patriarchal society takes time, but perhaps the first, and most important, step is discussing it.